Parenting

     I recently wrote an article about the challenges parents face helping their young daughters make appropriate clothing choices in the face of increasing fashion industry pressure to look and dress “sexy.”

     Another side to this issue is the effect this pressure has on young boys.

     I read a New York Times column this morning by Bruce Feiler about the the way the fashion industry is marketing sexually oriented clothes to his 8 year old daughters. The column was called “This Life” and the subhead was “A Line Between Sweet and Skimpy.”

     It struck me that the challenges he described are even greater for dads of daughters who have social challenges related to Asperger Syndrome. Girls with Asperger Syndrome can be at risk of trying too hard to fit in and can have a harder time accepting explanations about what's appropriate to wear.

     It's hard to overstate the value of self-esteem. It supercharges our brains to give us ideas and energy. It makes us feel and look better. But the dark side to this equation is that a lack of self-esteem has the opposite effect. 

     If talking to children about sex is hard for most parents, it can be a real nail-biter for parents of kids who have Asperger Syndrome.  But if you've been dreading having "The Talk," some of the reasons going through your head may not be based in fact.

     Who do you believe? It’s an important question for you and your children on the autism spectrum. It’s hard enough to counsel kids about who to trust on a personal level. But how about all the information they have access to through the media and the Internet?

Parents respond in all sorts of ways when a school reports their children are bullying others. But if schools really want to get these parents’ attention, they might want to share information about how much damage bullying does…to bullies.

 I’ve written a lot about my son, Drew, who has Asperger Syndrome.  For this Father’s Day, I’m going to talk about his neurotypical sister, Jessie. 

     You’re right.  You know you’re right.  You know what’s best for your child.  You also know he’s not buying it.  She’s got her own ideas and your logic won’t penetrate her shields.

     Many of us would shout “Eureka!” if we found a magic key that would unlock ways to motivate our children with Asperger Syndrome or similar autism spectrum disorders (ASDs).

     Your son or daughter has Asperger Syndrome.  How are you, as a dad, dealing with it?

     Here’s a test to help you analyze how your approach is working.